Friday, April 23, 2010

Missing Greg

I am in a really dark place this morning. My brother Greg died two years ago today. He was only 44. I miss him so much.

I told Brian I wasn't sure how I would make it through this day alone.

He said, "Be strong. Greg does not want you to suffer. Celebrate his life."

That's good advice. I *do* celebrate his life. Greg was smart and funny, gentle and generous, simple and complex, sweet and good and kind. The world is a better place because he was in it.

Then it occurs to me: Greg would have really liked Brian. And I feel sad all over again.

I've been looking through old pictures today. Like the one above. They make me smile. Just before they make me cry. I had no idea that would be the last picture of us together.

So many memories. So little time.

I love you, little brother. I always will.

4 comments:

Tami Brothers said...

I feel ya, girl! I lost two brothers in the month of April a long time ago. But April just really sucks for me.

I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers today.

Hang in there.

Tami

Pam said...

Wow, Tami. I'm sorry. I lost another brother, too, almost 30 years ago now. I miss them every day. We'll just hold each other up, okay?

Julee said...

I just scanned in a bunch of pictures of my brother Joe who was killed in January of 1969 and it really made me cry even after so long. While I was really young then, I feel your pain and sense of loss. It gets better, easier, but you never forget. Please remember the good times and the smiles. I know you're grateful for the pictures and memories.

Pam said...

Julee,
I don't think it matters whether you're 10 or 100 or somewhere in between, it's terrible to lose someone you love, and it changes you forever.
Thanks for posting.
Pam