Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Ghosts Of Christmas Past

Josh and Casey
There have been times I have wished that I had spent less money on toys and put more money into college accounts. But right this minute I am happy about every penny I blew to make my children's Christmas wishes come true. Because now they are young adults with grown-up problems and there isn't a darn thing I can do to make any of them go away. At least we have our memories.

Nathan
Nope. I don't regret a single moment I spent with my boys reading holiday stories, baking Christmas cookies, or doing holiday crafts.  As a matter of fact, I would give a million bucks to have just one of those days back.

Josh, Casey and Nathan, you will not understand the depth of my love for each of you until you have children of your own. I wish you a very Merry Christmas and every good thing in 2012.

And always.

10 comments:

pat said...

Dearest Pam,
It's amazing now to think that before we lost track of each other, Josh was a baby, and Casey and Nathan hadn't even arrived yet! I haven't really told you what a joy it has been for me to suddenly "fast forward" to meet these 3 young men as they are now. I feel fortunate to have gotten a little time with each of them. They have wonderful unique talents and interests and I have loved following their progress these last two years. They wouldn't know there's already a place in my heart for each of them.
As we travel our individual paths in life, joy and sorrow are always along for the ride. And right now, it's a big roller coaster ride with exhilarating highs and sudden plunges. When Josh, Casey and Nathan each reach that point in life when they understand the depth of your love for them, perhaps they will also realize the complete commitment and total sacrifice you made for them.
They read all the wonderful comments made about you in your blog... How can they not know that they've been given the gift of an amazing mother?
You know, when sons are going through these tumultuous times, it might be sometimes difficult to believe... and it would be oh so very helpful if they would just show it more often but... they love you dearly.

Pam Asberry said...

Comparing life right now to a roller coaster ride hits the proverbial nail on the head, Pat. :-) But the fact is that it isn't my boys' responsibility to let me know they love me - and I know they do. However, although is MY responsibility to let me know I love them, I will probably have to find another way to do it, because I don't think they read my blog! ;-)

Michele Stefanides said...

What a beautiful post! My kids are grown now, too, and there's nothing that pains me more than seeing their struggles and not being able to fix them. It was so easy when they were little--kiss the boo boo, put Barbie's head back on, splurge at McDonald's. Now, not so much. Great memories, to be sure.

J.L. Campbell said...

What makes Christmas special is the time spent with family. I totally understand doing everything to make that time a wonderful treat for your children. They've got a great mother. Happy Holidays!

Pam Asberry said...

Thanks, Michele. This is a tough season as a parent; they are old enough to be on their own, but not really settled into an adult lifestyle. It's hard not to worry! So I am grateful for every precious memory. Happy Holidays to you and yours!

Pam Asberry said...

Aw, thanks, J.L. I do my best but it seems like it's never enough. Thank you so much for visiting my blog and commenting. I hope you and yours have a joyous holiday season!

Carol Kilgore said...

A very sweet and heartfelt message to your sons. Good for you, mama. Family is precious.

Pam Asberry said...

Thank you, Carol. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! :-)

SAIDFRAZ said...

Isn't it fun to look back on Christmas' past?!

Pam Asberry said...

Indeed it is, Sherri. And there are lots more pictures where these came from! :-)