Friday, June 29, 2012

Saying Hello to Goodbye


With every goodbye, you learn.
~ Veronica A. Shoffstall

On a dark day, life seems like nothing more than a torrential downpour of goodbyes. Like tourists without umbrellas, we are caught off guard and unprepared. Neighbors move away; we feel abandoned. Friends move on; we don't understand why. Loved ones die and leave a hole that never stops gaping.

It is hard enough to be the one left behind, to fight through the inevitable denial, guilt, anger, and depression that we hope will eventually turn and lead us to a place of acceptance.

But it isn't easy to be the one pulling the trigger, either.

Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy.
~ Unknown

Don't misunderstand me. I don't believe that we have license to shirk our sacred responsibilities or to choose our associates and activities based solely on what we have to gain from them. I have been taken advantage of more times than I like to admit by narcissistic, self-serving others - hollow, empty individuals who suck the lifeblood from everyone they meet in a pitiful attempt to fill the bottomless void that exists within themselves - and I never want to inflict that kind of pain on another human being. But sometimes there comes a time - in a marriage, in a relationship with an adult child, in a romance, in a friendship - when we are left with no choice but to walk away. Making that decision is agonizing. The huge sense of relief we experience in its wake is the affirmation.

Letting go means to come to the realization that some people are part of your HISTORY but not a part of your DESTINY.

~ Steve Maraboli

I am truly grateful for all the people with whom I have shared a part - however great or small, however pleasurable or painful - of my life. Each played a role in shaping who I am today, and I wouldn't have me any other way. But now I get to choose who walks with me into the future. Are you negative, critical, bigoted, small-minded, judgmental, harsh, blaming? Please, stay out of my way. Are you positive, supportive, accepting, forward-thinking, seeking, kind, forgiving? Take my hand and travel with me. Let's walk together into the sunshine.

5 comments:

S.M. Carrière said...

I loved this post. It took me a very long time to learn to let go. Once I did, life improved in leaps and bounds!

Pam Asberry said...

I am a slow study, S.M. But I am learning!

LisaAnn said...

This is a wonderful post, and these quotes are definitely words to live by. I hope you pull the trigger on whoever needs to be cut loose from your life. I especially love this quote:

"Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy."

I was actually just thinking about this quote the other day to describe someone in MY life, too.

Life is too short for negativity and social climbing, you know??

LisaAnn said...

P.S.- I want a full update on the conclusion of your amazing vacation!!

Pam Asberry said...

Thank you so much, Lisa Ann. Yes, life is too short to waste a single precious moment.

Here is a link to the final installment of my vacation travelogue. Enjoy! :-)

http://pamasberry.blogspot.com/2012/06/travelogue-part-7-moorea-day-2.html